Visiting

The lights come on. You wake up. [[Where am I?]] (if: $loopNumber > 1) [[[I remember this place.]]]

You strain to look around. You're in a hospital bed. The room is white. The lights, now they're on, light up everything. It's clinically clean, all washed down and spotless. Even the vase of flowers on the side-table are flawlessly white. The observation window that makes up the opposite wall is without a single smudge. The space is virtually perfect. [[Flowers?]] [[Observation window?]] [[Why am I here?]]

You chuckle to yourself. People have been trying to answer that question for a very long time. At least you've still got your sense of humour. And as your head clears, you remember: It's visiting hours. [[Ah, yes.]] [[Oh, God.]]

Say what you will about the family, they're not shy to come and see you. You love them, obviously. But they woke you up for a visit yesterday too. (set: $visitingHours to 1) [[And the day before that?]] [[They must have brought the flowers.]] (if: $old is false) [[[Is that what the window is for?->Observation window?]] ][[Are we sure about the "loving them" bit?]]

I know, right. They were here just yesterday. And the day before. (set: $visitingHours to 1) [[And the day before that?]] [[They must have brought the flowers.]] (if: $old is false) [[[Is that what the window is for?->Observation window?]] ] [[When do they get here?]]

A bouquet of white flowers sit in a thin glass vase by the side of your bed. They must be fresh. There's not a sign of wilting or withering anywhere, and each one stands tall, perfectly shaped, and pretty. They've not even lost a petal. (set: $flowersAcknowledged to true) [[What kind of flowers?]]

You can't tell what kind of flowers they are. That was never much your area. Not roses, you're pretty sure. Tulips, maybe? Liz would know. She'll arrive any moment. Ask her. (if: $visitingHours is 0) [ It's visiting hours. [[Ah, yes.]] [[Oh, God.]]] (if: $visitingHours is 1) [[When do they get here?]]

Well, they certainly love you. There's sort of an expectation you keep up your end of the deal. [[If they love you so much, they must have brought the flowers.->They must have brought the flowers.]] (if: $old is false) [ [[Is that what the window is for?->Observation window?]] ] [[When do they get here?]]

Yeah. It's a bit much. [[And the day before *that*?]] (if: $old is false) [[[Is that what the window is for?->Observation window?]] ] [[When do they get here?]]

Program starting. Please press [[Continue->Waking Up]] (set: $loopNumber to 1) (set: $flowersAcknowledged to false) (set: $old to false) (set: $visitingHours to 0) (set: $sayNothing to 0)

As you process the thought, which you realise you've been doing in an oddly ordered and uncharacteristically sensible way, the observation window (text-colour:yellow)[LIGHTS UP] as somebody thumbs the light switch in the opposite room. There they are. (set: $visitingHours to 2) (set: $whoBroughtFlowers to false) [[Who are they?]] (set: $answeredherquestion to 0)

(if: $flowersAcknowledged is true) [Possibly. But something doesn't seem quite right.] (if: $flowersAcknowledged is false) [Something about the flowers strikes you as wrong. You can't immediately tell what it is. [[What's wrong with the flowers?->Flowers?]] ] (if: $old is false) [[[What was that about a big window?->Observation window?]] ] [[When do they get here?]]

There's a massive sheet of glass, almost the height of the room, on the opposite wall, a few meters from the end of your hospital bed, facing you. It's nothing like anything you've seen in hospitals on TV, but maybe it's normal? [[Is that really what I look like?]] [[What kind of hospital room is this?]]

Yeah. We get the picture. [[They must have brought the flowers.]] (if: $old is false) [[[Is that what the window is for?->Observation window?]] ] [[When do they get here?]]

A couple stand there, smiling in, leaning on each other. A man and a woman. You remember their names: [[Liz]] and [[Georgi]]

This one's yours. She seems the more eager of the two. Presumably, visiting is her idea. You should talk to her about that. And the flowers. As you look closer, it strikes you that something is wrong with her. That twangs in your chest. Your daughter. [["What's wrong?"]] [[What's wrong?]]

This one's hers. You notice he's looking more at her than at you, but both of them with much the same big, sad eyes. [[Is something wrong with her?->What's wrong?]] [["What's wrong?"]] [["You didn't bring flowers."]]

"Nothing, mum. It's just good to see you again." She doesn't want to say. But something is definitely off about her. [["Since yesterday?"]] [["You didn't bring flowers."]]

(if: $old is false) [Something in her posture? Her skin? You can't figure it out. You should ask her. Or Georgi. [["What's wrong?"]] ] (if: $old is true) [She's old now. When did that happen? Your little girl looks the same age as you are. But that's not possible. [["You're too old."]]]

Old? Yeah. Basically. But trust me, you look pretty good for your age. (set: $old to true) (if: $flowersAcknowledged is false) [[[What about the flowers?->Flowers?]]] (if: $visitingHours is 0)[ [[Why am I here?]]] (if: $visitingHours is 1) [ [[When do they get here?]]]

That's the best question you've asked today. But I'm afraid you don't know. (if: $flowersAcknowledged is false) [But something seems wrong about the flowers. [[What's wrong with the flowers.->Flowers?]] ] (if: $visitingHours is 0)[[[Why am I here?]] ] (if: $visitingHours is 1) [ [[When do they get here?]] ]

"Mum, we didn't visit yesterday." "It's actually been quite a while," Georgi adds. [["You didn't bring flowers."]] [["What kind of hospital room is this?"]] [["Why visit now?"]] (set: $beenawhile to true)

"Oh. Uh, no. I didn't even think. Sorry." Georgi pitches in: "I don't entirely see how we'd get them to you, to be fair." [["Then who brought me flowers?"]] [["What kind of hospital room is this?"]]

Georgi laughs, "Tell me about it!" And Liz scowls at him, so he stops. "It's been a long time for me," she says, smiling softly and sadly, more to herself than to you. [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]] (set: $Lizistooold to true)

Are you sure? [[Yes.]] [[No, it's her.->It's her.]] [[I don't know yet.]]

Are you sure? [[Yes.]] [[No, it's me.->It's me.]] [[I don't know yet.]]

Georgi says, "I think they just come with the room. They were here last time we came." (if: $beenawhile is true) [Which was a while ago. But somehow the flowers are still fresh?] [["What kind of flowers are these?"]] [["What kind of hospital room is this?"]] (if: $beenawhile is true) [ [["But they're still fresh?"]]]

"Just a hospital room, mum." "It's a kind of visiting room. For observation." "So we can see you." (set: $observationRoom to true) [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]]

You should ask some questions. (if: $old is false and $beenawhile is true) [ You notice, for the first time, the age in your daughter's face. [["You're too old."]] ] [["You didn't bring flowers."]] [["What kind of flowers are these?"]] [["Didn't you just visit yesterday?"->"Since yesterday?"]] [["What kind of hospital room is this?"]] [["Why visit now?"]]

Liz leans in towards the window. "Lilies, I think. But I haven't got my glasses." [[Something's wrong.->Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]] (set: $Lilies to true)

Liz breathes deep. "The same thing that's wrong with me. The same thing that happens to all of us, always a little sooner than we'd like." [["I'm dying?"]] [["You're dying?"]]

Then ask. [["What's wrong with me?"]] [["What's wrong with you?"]] (set: $story to 0)

Liz breathes deep. "The same thing that's wrong with you. The same thing that happens to all of us, always a little sooner than we'd like." [["You're dying?"]] [["I'm dying?"]]

Georgi looks away. Liz speaks quietly: "We thought it was probably the last chance we'd get." (if: $answeredherquestion is 0) [She looks at Georgi. There's a silent acknowledgement between them. He nods. "And, mum, I wanted to ask how it is ... in there." You take a moment to think before you reply. [["It's lonely."]] [["It's confusing."]] [["It's good to see you."]]] (set: $lastChance to true)

Something is wrong here. (if: $Lilies is true and $Lizistooold is true and $beenawhile is true and $observationRoom is true and $answeredherquestion > 0) [And, with a deep and horrible feeling in your chest, you think you know what it is. [[It's her.]] [[It's me.]] ] (else:)[ (if: $flowersAcknowledged is true)[How are old flowers still fresh?] (if: $Lilies is true) [Who puts lilies by a hospital bed? It's more than a little morbid. ] (if: $Lizistooold is true) [Your daughter looks older than you do. How is that possible? ] (if: $beenawhile is true) [You remember their last visit like it was yesterday, but they say it's been ages. Why don't you remember anything since? ] (if: $observationRoom is true) [This is some kind of observation room? ] (if: $answeredherquestion > 0) [What do they mean when they say this is the last chance they'll get? ] ''Something is definitely wrong. But with who?'' [[It's me.]] [[It's her.]] [[I don't know yet.]] ]

Liz says, "Technology is ever so clever these days. It can keep things alive long after they would usually have expired." [["What kind of hospital room is this?"]] [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]]

"It's good to see you, too." Georgi swallows back something, bites his lip. It looks like he's trying not to cry. [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]] (set: $answeredherquestion to 3)

Georgi asks, as quick as instinct, "What do you mean?" You think about it. [["It's lonely being on this side of the glass."]] [["It's lonely here without Liz's father."]]

Liz smiles. "I can only imagine. And I'm sorry about that." [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]] (set: $answeredherquestion to 2)

Georgi has no response. He sits there, quiet. Liz says, "I'm sorry about that. But it's very good to know." [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]] (set: $answeredherquestion to 1)

"If you had a chance to talk to him again, would you?" [["I will have that chance. And I look forward to it more than anything else."]] [["I won't ever have that chance. He's gone, and anything else is just a trick of the light."]]

Liz and Georgi share a look. [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]] (set: $answeredherquestion to 4)

Liz looks to the ground. Georgi says, "Thank you." [[Something's wrong. The question is who it is wrong with.]] (set: $answeredherquestion to 5)

"No. Not anymore."(set: $story to $story +1) (if: $story is 1) [ [[And you?->"You're dying?"]]] (if: $story >1) [She says, "Same thing's happening to me as happened to you. Time caught up. The hours ran out. That's the thing that it's so easy to forget about life; it was never made to be permanent. We're only ever, any of us, visiting." (if: $Lilies is true) [ [["Lilies are funeral flowers."]] ] (if: $observationRoom is true) [ [["When you said 'visiting room'..."]] ] (else:) [ [["I don't understand."->"Why?"]]]]

Georgi stands up suddenly. As if emotion rushing through his body had straightened his knees without conscious thought. Liz glances at him, and then nods wearily. (set: $story to $story +1) (if: $story is 1) [ [["And I'm dying too."->"I'm dying?"]] ] (if: $story >1) [She says, "Same thing's happening to me as happened to you. Time caught up. The hours ran out. That's the thing, it's so easy to forget about life; it was never made to be permanent. We're only ever, any of us, visiting." (if: $Lilies is true) [ [["Lilies are funeral flowers."]] ] (if: $observationRoom is true) [ [["When you said 'visiting room'..."]] ] (else:) [ [["I don't understand."->"Why?"]]]]

"I guess they're there for our benefit. To set the right tone. I don't expect they thought you would notice." [["What kind of visiting room is this?"->"Why?"]]

"For you to visit us. To bring you back, just for a bit." [["Why?"]]

(if: $answeredherquestion is 0) ["Because most people miss people, mum." ](if: $answeredherquestion is 1) ["Like you said; it's lonely." ](if: $answeredherquestion is 2) ["Like you said; it's confusing." ](if: $answeredherquestion is 3) ["Like you said; it's good to see you." ](if: $answeredherquestion is 4) ["Like you said; it's the thing we all want more than anything else." ](if: $answeredherquestion is 5) ["Like you said; most people don't get the chance. And it's a hell of a trick."] Georgi speaks for the first time in a while. "But it is just a trick." Liz looks back at you. "Some people need closure. Some people need time. Some people struggle without the person they built their life around." Georgi shakes his head. "I'll be fine." Liz ignores him. "But whatever the reason, whenever they do, these lucky people can switch their loved ones back on and visit." (if: $flowersAcknowledged is true)[ [[That's how the flowers are still fresh...]] ] (if: $beenawhile is true or $Lizistooold is true) [[[That's why it only feels like yesterday.->That's how the flowers are still fresh...]] ] (else:) [[[This isn't actually a hospital room...->That's how the flowers are still fresh...]]]

(if: $answeredherquestion is 0 or 2 or 4) [Georgi says, "But we just wanted advice. And you've given us a lot to think about."] (if: $answeredherquestion is 1 or 5) [Georgi says, "But we just wanted advice, and I think we've got it." Liz looks at him. (if: $answeredherquestion is 1) ["It's lonely." ] (if: $answeredherquestion is 5) ["It's not real."] ] (if: $answeredherquestion is 3) [Georgi says, "Whatever the context, it really is good to see you." ] Liz says, "I want to be here for him after I'm gone. I don't want him to be alone. But if it's just a computer puppeteering my voice, then I don't know... "Mum, what do you think?" [[Think.]] [[Talk.]]

You think. Liz keeps talking, maybe just to fill the air: "You didn't get a say in getting switched on. None of us did, I suppose. But we all have a say in what happens next." "Would you wish this on someone else?" Georgi presses, eager for an answer. "Should I go through with it?" [[Talk.]]

(if: $sayNothing is 0) [You think about what to say. ]Liz and Georgi watch, waiting. [["Of course I recommend it."->reaction]] [["You should be there for Georgi."->reaction]] [["It's definitely worth the price."->reaction]] [["Death doesn't have to be the end."->reaction]] (if: $sayNothing is 0) [[[Say nothing.->Talk.]]] (set: $sayNothing to $sayNothing + 1)

Georgi says, "That's not what it sounded like before." [["You can trust me."->End.]] (if: $sayNothing < 2) [ [[Say nothing.->reaction]]] (set: $sayNothing to $sayNothing +2)

They look between each other, and then back at you. "Alright, mum. I think it's time we go. Thanks for helping us decide. I think we've made our choice." Georgi picks up a remote control and pauses a second, considering it. "I am sorry," he says. Then he points the remote, presses a button, and the lights go back out. And you die one last time.